The Husband Project

Ok. So here is the layout of the 21 day husband project. I will write a post after each project I do and let ya'll know how it goes :)

Day 1- 30 Minutes of relaxing when Josh gets home from work. Let him have 30 minutes to relax after work. Let him play video games, or take a nap. Just stay out of his hair and let him wind down.

Day 2- Go on a drive/hike. There is a gorgeous canyon up here in Rexburg. I figure we can go drive up through there and walk around.

Day 3- Take as many opportunities to brag about my Josh :) Slip into conversations with him that i've bragged about him today.

Day 4- A food JUST for him. I'm going to make him lemon butter salmon (ick) and I will have something else for dinner :)

Day 5- Text him all day telling him how awesome he is and how much I love him.

Day 6- Hold his hand or snuggle him close when I have the chance.

Day 7- Get gorgeous JUST for him. Even if we're staying in for the night. Be pretty.

Day 8- Cook dinner and take it somewhere fun to eat. Maybe a chinese night sitting on pillows in our living room? I'm still a little uncertain on the details of what to eat and where. But it WILL be fun!

Day 9- Help him get ready for work. Wake up early and iron his shirt and pants for him and lay out an outfit fresh and clean. Make him breakfast and help him get out the door to work.

Day 10- Get a new cute outfit that he will LOVE. This day benefits both of us :)

Day 11- Let him come home to a very clean and peaceful house. Have pretty music playing and yummy candles burning.

Day 12- Write him a note on the bathroom mirror with some of the many things I love about him on it. Let him see it when he goes to take a shower in the morning.

Day 13- Keep Josh on my mind all day long. Pray for him throughout the day. let him know he's been on my mind all day long.

Day 14- Cook something that the both of us will enjoy. Something gourmet. Will decide what at a later date :)

Day 15- Throw away one item of clothing he really just doesn't like on me that much. If it's something I love throw it away and replace it with something we both love.

Day 16- Tell Josh all day long how dang good looking he is :) This one won't be hard at all! Luckily I got a good lookin man!

Day 17- Do all the chores (Garbage, Laundry, Dishes). In the book the lady says "A man that does dishes and laundry and cleaned the house is a dime in a dozen and really only existed on romantic movies". I guess I am one of the extremely lucky people. He works AND goes to school plus does everything around our house so I don't have to. I know this isn't a temporary thing either. This is just how amazing this man is. Gosh dang I love him! So give him one day off and do everything for HIM.

Day 18- Take him out to his favorite restaurant for date night.

Day 19- Make him some breakfast in bed. "If I call you darling....will you make me pancakes?"

Day 20- Leave post it notes everywhere. This will be very cute and sentimental, because when we first started dating I would leave him post it notes with cute messages on them :)

Day 21- Let him pick ANY movie of his choice. Yes. This includes Discovery Channel or Blue Planet.

I love my man a ton. The goal here is to show that to him and let him know i'm striving to be a good wife :)

Scratch That Last Post!

SO I had the 30 days planned out. But then my awesome sister told me about this book called "The Husband Project". I really liked the first few chapters and decided to switch my plan over to this book. I am going to finish reading it this weekend. Sunday I will set out my plan, and Monday it will go into action. I will be posting about each project. 21 to be exact. I hope this works as good as every claims!

30 Days to Becoming a Better Wife

Well...I feel like it's finally happened. I feel like the honeymoon phase is a little bit over, yet Josh still turns out to be so amazing and surprise me every day. Maybe it's just the pregnancy, but I feel like I haven't been the awesome wife I had hoped to be. Our house isn't always the cleanest, I don't get pretty every day, when I feel sick I just lay down for the night. Yup. I feel like one good for nothing wife, even though Josh tells me every day that's not true. So I have decided to take a challenge. I'm posting about it because I feel like if I throw it out there in public, I will be more inclined to stick with it so I don't look like a quitter as well.
My project is called "30 Days to Becoming a Better Wife". A family member of mine had done "30 Days to Becoming a Better Man" and I loved seeing his posts every day. Unfortunately on the internet I couldn't find a day by day challenge to become a better wife, just tips on how to be better. So I'm taking some of the tips I've found and adding in my own here and there. Then hopefully by then end of 30 days I will feel like a more accomplished wife. Here's the list ( I stole it from a website that gave a list of tips to be a better wife, then took out some, and added my own)

Here's the goal. One per day. However, each day i'm going to try and implement the days before into my day still. So on day 5, I will still try to do tasks from day 1,2,3,&4. I will just mainly focus on 5 while throwing in things from previous days as well. Each day I will blog about what I have done for that day and how it has made it better. My hope is that I will become a better wife and gain the habits I need to stay a good wife.

If any of you have any other suggestions on what I should add into here, please feel free to leave comments. I would be more than happy to get other comments and thoughts on how this project is going. I can take constructive criticism :)

1. Be Pretty. Get pretty for him every day. Not just on special occasions or when you have to go out of the house. Get pretty for HIM. 

2. Play More. Men like to play with their wives. Make efforts to do things your husband enjoys. Deep down, they want us with them as a playmate. If your husband has a hobby, learn to do it with him and have fun. Or, learn something together and do it regularly. Play cards or games together. The point is to have fun doing things with him that he enjoys. No nagging allowed in these moments. Only good, clean FUN!

3. Make Him a Priority. He should KNOW that he is important to you and that he comes above all others.

4. Pray for Him. Praying for your husband is one of the most powerful and important things you can do for him! Do it daily–especially when he ticks you off! THAT is the BEST time to pray for him! ;)

5. Feed Him. It has been said that the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach…

6. Clean the House. If you are a homemaker or have a husband that just does not do what you feel is “his share” around the house…move on from your “feelings” on the matter and clean the house. God is sure to bless you for your sacrifice and honoring of your hubbie.

7. All About Him Day. One day just serving your husband. Make his favorite meal, give him a shoulder rub, clean his car. Make his day!

8. I love you day! See how many times you can tell him you love him (for reals) in one day. Cute notes. A text or phone call during work. 

9. Honor Him in Front of Others. Be very careful how you speak to others about your husband. You should never ever ever bash him to friends in or out of his presence. Speak LIFE–always.

10. Date Night In. Rent a movie he's wanted to see. Order in food. 

11. Forgive Him. I strongly believe that forgiveness is the ONLY way anyone can have a long lasting marriage. One cannot expect to spend a lifetime with someone and never experience betrayal, disappointments and pain. When we come to a place where we CHOOSE to not allow divorce to be an option and FORGIVE as we are forgiven, we may just find ourselves in an awesome marriage! (I feel like I get frustrated about dumb things lately. Try to not get upset about stuff)

12. Affirm Him. Men like words of affirmation. Speak positive over him and words of truth. TELL him that he is sexy, compliment him, tell him… good job, thank you, I appreciate you, etc. Point out the good regularly. I also looked up affirm in the dictionary and found words like;  declare the truth of something , certify, cinch, confirm, declare, guarantee, profess, pronounce, repeat, vouch, witness. On the flip side I found the following antonyms in the thesaurus:  deny, negate, nullify, veto. Affirm him!

13. Help Him. We were created to be their helpers. Help him when he needs it and help him by keeping your own conduct in check.

14. Let go of Anger. Anger leads to sin and does not accomplish anything other than pain. I have learned over the years that the only way to ever get results with any issue is when I have looked beyond my emotions and let go of anger.

15. Be Ready for Him. If you are a woman blessed enough to stay home, make sure you are ready for your husband when he gets  home. Have the dishes done, the house cleaned, and dinner cooked. That way you don't spend time away from him still doing stuff when he get's home. If you work later than him, make sure you still make a point to greet him and let him know you missed him and he is your priority.

16. Get Sporty. AS, I mentioned above, men like playmates. It would behoove you to play something sporty with him…perhaps tennis, basketball, golf, etc. If playing is out of the question for you, watch sports with him. Learn the game and get involved with him. It has been said that the couple that plays together stays together. I find this to be very true.

17. Do Not Nag Him. There is nothing quite as sad as a nagging wife. Do not open the door for your poor husband to dread you. Now, on the other hand, men need to be reminded more than once. However, this is a delicate balance and must be handled as such. It really is HOW you “remind” your husband. Tone is everything…Remember: honey goes down a lot easier than an acid tongue. 

18. Work Out. Whether it's together or just you. Try to stay fit and toned. Make sure you still try and be gorgeous for him. 

19. Make Breakfast In Bed. Get up and make him something yummy. Take it to him in bed and make sure you tell him you love him. 

20. Random Acts of Kindness. The little things really do matter in a marriage. Put forth effort to do kind things for your husband. Little or big–they all matter.

21. Go for a drive. Go for a drive with your husband. Get away from the cellphones, TV's and Electronics. Go stargazing and talk about your day. 

22. LET Him Lead. This is a tough one for “today’s woman”. Unfortunately, God already made the decision of who is the head in a marriage. As women, when we are not allowing our husbands to be in their God-given roll, we are sinning. We are disobeying God. There is no other way to say it. Allowing our husbands to lead is a good thing, and when we do, God is sure to bless us! I believe He will also protect us when our husbands make the wrong choice–because we were obedient to the Lord. 

23. Encourage Him. Men…and women really need encouragement. Encourage him to do good by speaking it over him. Encourage means: to make (someone) more determined, hopeful, or confident–assist, help. I also looked in the thesaurus and found words like; cheer up, brighten, boost, praise, prop up, gladden , strengthen and inspire. On the flip side, I found the following antonyms; dampen, deject, depress, deter, discourage, dispirit, dissuade, uninspire, counter, deter, frustrate, hinder, hurt, impede, obstruct and resist. Wow!

24. Ask God to Change YOU. Asking God to change your husband is never going to lead to anything other than your own frustration. What we need to be asking is for God to change US into the wives HE wants us to be. When we do this, the rest will fall into place because we are seeking God about our own actions. We will not be accountable for what our husbands did…only what WE did…

25. Say Thank You. I have gotten into the habit of saying (and teaching my daughters to do the same) thank you when we go out to eat as a family. Yes, I bring money into the home and it may be what I earned that afforded us to go to dinner, but it is a respectful thing to do that really makes him smile. I mean just saying “thank you for dinner honey (or daddy as the girls say)” makes him feel good and like he is providing pleasure for us. Look for ways to say thank you to your husband–if you have children, teach them the same. An attitude of gratitude works wonders!

26. Make sure you pray and study Scriptures together. Don't let this slip away. A couple that prays together stays together. 

27. Dress Good. Make sure even if you get ready for the day you don't just stay in jeans and a tshirt. Put a dress on for date's every once in a while. Put on a cute outfit and he will notice the difference. 

28. Smile. It takes less facial muscles to smile than to frown. Smiling lines look better than frown lines. Smiling makes you and others feel good! Smiles beget smiles. Smile!! :D

29. Stop Complaining to him. We are supposed to confide in our husbands, but do we pull them down with us if we complain too often? Try to keep complaining about headaches, work, or kids to yourself and notice the difference in his attitude. 

30. Trust Him. I remember awhile back when my husband was driving us somewhere new and I kept trying to tell him which way to go. I even got quite ticked when I thought he went the wrong way. He finally looked at me and said; “Can you please just trust me and let me do this. Even if I get lost, I just need you to be supportive and stop telling me what to do!” Um…wow. Yeah, they actually want our support and to trust them–even when they may get it wrong. *sigh*

Baby...You're my muse

I just want to take a minute and brag on my husband...

This guy does dishes, laundry, cleans the house, goes to school, and works all so I don't have to! He rocks my world. He does everything without complaining or even being asked. Every day he finds a way to serve me. He's also very sentimental and sweet :) I love that guy! I know every girl thinks this about their husbands....but for me, I truly have the PERFECT husband, and could not have chosen anybody better! I know for a fact that he will also be an amazing dad, our baby is one lucky kid to have a dad as good as Josh!

I love him more and more every day and I hope Maddox grows up to be such a good man like his daddy!

A Special Day

Today was a really special day for me and Josh. We were able to go have a FUN ultrasound and have a good long look at our baby and find out the gender. It turns out it is a sweet little BOY! We are so thrilled. His name will be Maddox Jeffery Wray! We have been blessed to have 4 ultrasounds in this pregnancy already (they have me at high risk so I get ultrasounds every time I sneeze it feels like). Unfortunately these ultrasounds are usually stressful, the screen is turned toward the Dr. and tech the whole time, and we come away with just a little picture of our baby. Today we had a full 15 minutes of just a very quiet cozy room on a very comfy bed (for me) and couch (for Josh). It wasn't stressful at all after we saw our baby. They had it projected on the whole entire wall in front of us. It was very sweet to watch him. Our baby struggled for a few good minutes to suck his thumb. He finally got a few fingers in his mouth, but then gave up. He smiled at us and  curled up and posed really cute, and he flashed enough of his man parts to 100% accurately say that it is definitely a boy!

We struggled all day to keep our mouths shut, we even had to run away from a few people because they almost got it out of us, then tonight we had a party at my sisters house. My sister was awesome and made really delicious coconut cream cupcakes with a blue center filling :) My Rebman side aunts and uncles were there along with my family. It was really fun to talk and hear their name suggestions and baby guesses. We had a blast!

All day i've been a little bit choked up looking at our ultrasound pictures. I feel like this is all a little surreal, he looks like such a sweet little baby and spirit and I worry about the world he'll come into, and I worry about being a good mom for him. At the same time I feel so blessed to be sent such a perfect little boy. We love him to death already and we can't wait to hold him in our arms in a few short months :)


We <3 you Maddox!

 His cute little profile :)

Maddox trying so desperately to suck his little thumb while he stretched out his legs at the same time :)

P.S. I didn't really want to post my ultrasound pictures all over Facebook, I felt better about posting 1 or 2 on my personal blog that only closer friends and family follow :)

Babe Wray

That's been this kids name for the past few weeks.
Last night Josh was able to feel him for the first time! I've felt him more and more lately. Nothing strong, but I can definitely feel him. I went in for an ultrasound and the Dr. had the screen turned towards him, I felt the baby and said "Oh!" and the Dr was like "You felt that? He just moved". So now I have verification I'm not just crazy! I'll be 15 weeks tomorrow (the Dr. moved me up a few days (3) , I was a little further along than he thought I was originally) Last night I was laying on my stomach in front of the humidifier so I could stop coughing for more than a minute. I felt him move and told Josh. He put his hand under my belly and he could without a doubt feel the baby move around. We feel him better if I lay on my tummy (poor kid)!
Anyway it's really awesome that we have been able to feel him and it's a blessing knowing that he's doing good, and it was really fun for Josh to be able to feel him a little bit!

We ordered a crib today (my parents got it for me for my birthday, they are awesome!) It should be here in 2 weeks and we are stoked!
Only 5 more days until we found out what this little baby is! We can't wait! We also can't wait to be in warm weather with family! It will definitely be a nice little break that we need :)